Have you ever had a person in your life who seems to leave you feeling exhausted whenever you are around them for very long? Your mood might even lower after your interaction with them. You may have been feeling really good, having a nice day, and for some reason, you are just drained.

 Boom! That was an interaction with an energy vampire.  

While the phrase “energy vampire” might seem like something from Twilight or a fantasy novel, it’s actually a very real thing and the good news is, there are steps you can take to not only recognize these people but also protect your energy so you don’t get drained.

Okay, so here is the tricky thing, most of the time energy vampires are not doing this consciously. They are not mean-spirited, and they are not intentionally trying to suck the life out of you. (Unless they are a narcissist, then chances are that is exactly why they are hanging around.

In most cases, this is an unconscious energy exchange where they draw energy from other people without returning any energy back. Your interaction with them will do nothing but drain you.  They leave feeling better and you leave wondering what just happened.  

There is hope, while evaluating relationships and cutting the toxic ones out of your life is important and often necessary, there are some people who aren’t an option to end a relationship with.  I am going to share what to do if your “energy vampire” happens to be someone who you want to keep in your life, perhaps even one of your children. 

First I want you to be clear that I am not talking about a friend who is going through a hard time. Maybe they lost their job or romantic relationship, and it’s all they ever talk about. This does not make them energy vampires.  This is a short-term situation and that relationship dynamic is healthy and beneficial to you as the caring friend, and them as the hurting friend.  I am speaking about the kind of person that always brings you down and leaves you feeling wiped out, no matter what is going on in their life. 

When you are a person who is filled with light and life, you will naturally attract energy vampires to you. Kind of like a moth to a lamp, they just can’t get enough of you. If you are very grounded then being around them will not drain you as easily, but eventually, it still will. Here are four steps to help you thrive and protect your energy.   

  1. Identify who the energy vampires are in your life. 
  2. Evaluate if there are any relationships you may need to end. 
  3. Notice how your body feels when you are not around them vs when you are around them.  When you begin to feel drained, allow yourself to end the conversation, leave the party, step out of the room. 
  4. Visualize – Before you interact with them set an intention that they are not allowed to take your energy. Imagine a bubble around you, protecting your energy and not allowing them access to it.  Feel your feet on the floor and connect with the earth.  Return to this visualization of the bubble and the floor connection anytime you need to during your time with them.  
  5. Energy Healing/Balancing Work –  If your system is drained from years spent around energy vampires, having an energy healing session that includes balancing your energy can be very revitalizing. It can benefit the entire family and even help those who are pulling extra energy from others to tap into their own vibrancy instead.

What if your child is the one draining your energy

I am not talking about the physical energy that comes from chasing them all over a playground. (Been there/Done that! May the coffee be with you!) 

If your child is emotionally/spiritually draining you, Understand that you can provide a supportive, loving, and nurturing environment to them while protecting your own energy. Try the steps above and remember that it’s not your job to keep them filled with energy.

What if I am the energy vampire?
Perhaps you read this and recognized yourself as an energy vampire. Don’t worry, it’s not your fault and you don’t have to remain that way. There is a good chance that your energetic system has some blockages and possible depletion. The first step would be clearing the blockages, and balancing the flow of energy, and filling up those depleted areas so that you have your own vibrancy that doesn’t need to come from other people.

You can do this with breathwork, guided chakra meditations, sound baths, or energy work like Reiki or craniosacral therapy.


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